What Next?

by Xanny Stars

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1.
Wild One 02:02
What were you thinking only wearing that dress when you know you're prone to leaving alone? Last night in the cold. This is such a mess. We called it from day one that you were the wild one but please don't throw it all away when you have much left to say. What were you thinking doing something so stupid when you know you're prone to becoming addicted? You're too young to die. There's no other reason why. Enough is enough and I hope this made you realize that you are so many good things you don't need any disguise.
2.
Charming #3 02:37
All I can say is you swept me away like the Twilight Zone but in a good way. You came along when I was finally free but I never thought you could actually, maybe, be for me. I'm not crying and you're not lying. Maybe we will see this through but I can't wait or hesitate. I'll see your face real soon. I was led on before so I can't know for sure. It's hard to believe when you're not here for me to see. Could this be real? I never know how to feel. But I can't imagine with you that something like that would ever happen. Things have changed the way we stand right now but I know you'll always be that guy somehow.
3.
Falling fast, falling fast. News flash! This one's just flying past. He's not coming back. But if he does it's not for you and by the time he does you'll have found someone. Someone new. You couldn't make up your mind and I couldn't be the one to change your mind. You had the decency to call but I was already on the other line. You had a plan, I knew that plan, but then things changed when you held my hand. It felt like four, now I'm not sure. So why care? Why? I might as well be getting high. I said the words but I don't know why and you said them back but they felt so dry. You said a name that wasn't mine and I should've took that as a sign. i'm on the other line.
4.
I still hate you because you still make me hate myself. Especially when I thought I was all well. Opening old wounds just to prove they never actually healed. I still can't let my shield. You had me thinking there's no way to tell myself I'll be okay. Memories don't fade as fast as you'd think. Maybe that's why there's so much wine to drink. Just what the hell is an ex-girl to do? Just what the hell is an ex-girl? I still hate you because you still make me think I'm crazy. I'd like to see your inner brain baby. Clenching my teeth at the thought of you in my dreams. So I continue to wake up with headaches and my chest filled with stakes. What a spineless snake. Don't get it twisted. They're stirring the pot. "Ew, she's obsessed with you!" That's all you've got! It wasn't easy being me. I hope one day you'll see as you're begging on your hands and knees.
5.
Spinning 03:42
I saw your new car in my dream and then I saw it on the highway. It almost caused a scene in the two lanes next to me. I looked forward but quickly sealed my eyes on the spider crawling on my windshield. Carefully I watched. Spinning his web like a song so soothing. Eventually I'll be suffocating. I've been bit a thousand times but I'm still not afraid. For anyone who thinks I lost, you're out of your damn mind. Each bite makes me tougher like a callus on the skin. If I let this hurt me too much, I'd turn to deadly sin. I'm sorry this had to happen. I'm sorry it was with you. But I'm happy now. I hope you're happy too.
6.
One man forcing another man forcing me against a wall. You could say that was the last straw. I don't feel comfortable here at all. This is not where I was to be. I'd rather be home watching T.V. than here where everyone's judging me. Squishing my self esteem. I wish I felt differently 'cause music is the one thing I need. One and two and three and four girls attacking me in the stall. Oddball, alcohol. Tears down my face like a waterfall. I don't feel comfortable here at all. Now that's what I call anxiety.
7.
If I could look at mountains everyday I think that I would be okay. Where I am is not where I want to stay. I want to go somewhere far away. I got this feeling when I'm alone that I can do anything. When I'm alone. Pretending it's warm outside or I'm on the JR line. East and west I'm caught between places where my head is clean. You said "I love you, too" so I'll run with you. Through the streets of Tokyo, through the streets of L.A. If I want to, then I will someday. When I came to (When I came to) I didn't know where I was. When I saw you (When I saw you) My whole world paused. What had you done? You're so good when you lie. (You're so good you lie) You're such a good guy. (Yeah, you're such a good guy) And I know you'll get by (Yeah, I know you'll get by) While a piece of me dies. When I came to (When I came to) I didn't know where I was. When I saw you (When I saw you) From there I was lost. What have you done? You're so good when you lie (You're so good you lie) You're such a good guy (Yeah, you're such a good guy) And I know you'll get by (Yeah, I know you'll get by) While a piece of me dies.

about

"maybe that's why there's so much wine to drink..."

credits

released April 12, 2019

Guitar/Vox - Allie
Bass/Vox - Mickey
Drums - Devin
Recorded by Paul Mac in Cleveland, Ohio

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Xanny Stars Cleveland, Ohio

"The Land's most anxious band"

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